Doug Stanhope
Doug Stanhope
Douglas Stanhope is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and author known for his cynical and controversial comedy style and libertarian political views...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 March 1967
CityWorcester, MA
CountryUnited States of America
brain comedy crafted element fact fraudulent months night rolling root though weeks
There's a fraudulent root element of comedy in that we say things night after night as though they are rolling effortlessly from the brain and off the tongue, when in fact they are crafted over weeks and months and years.
tonight kind problem
I have the kind of show that reminds you of your problems, and then I talk about other problems you didn't even know you had until tonight.
waiting parent wallets
I don't know. Both my parents are dead. So? Wait, I got pictures of their corpses in my wallet. I had them blown up as murals. Here.
good-things
I do good things in my life, too. It's just that none of them are funny.
mothers-day wall fists
Right at the end of the big wall of vibrators, $29.95, big rubber fist. Thirty bucks! Just in time for mothers day.
cds dvds ems
Steal my stuff off the internet wherever you can and don't apologize. Buy the CDs and DVDs from my site and feel free to burn 'em and share 'em. Then come to the show.
drinking sick alcohol
Did you ever drink so much of a certain type of alcohol that you get so sick that you can never drink the same kind again ? I've decided that's how I'm going to quit drinking. One-at-a-time.
cancer eye want
I don't like life that much. It's not that big a deal for me... I don't want to know I have cancer till it's visible to the naked eye.
drinking drug lasts
I've been doing a lot of drugs in the last few weeks and drinking less, and I feel much better.
pussy flaws mankind
Pussy really is the ultimate motivator of all mankind. No, don't clap, this is a flaw in the system!
punishment tickets vices
Every vice is already a punishment in itself... you don't need a ticket on top of it.
supposed-to-be
The Unbookables are supposed to be unbookable. That's what it's all about.
mutation enough exciting
Mutations are exciting, there aren't nearly enough of them.
progressive-society progressive institutions
The whole institution of marriage itself really has no place in a progressive society.