Jerry Seinfeld
Jerry Seinfeld
Jerome Allen "Jerry" Seinfeld is an American comedian, actor, director, writer, and producer...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth29 April 1954
CityBrooklyn, NY
CountryUnited States of America
drop life mind suits
As a comedian, I found this thing, this profession, that suits my mind and life force. To drop it to do something else? I just don't get that.
humor
Nobody enjoys the 'little show about nothing' humor more than me, but that is never the way I look at it.
looks chickens i-can
I can't eat chicken and look at strippers at the same time.
tired im-tired rich
I'm old, I'm rich and I'm tired.
laughing ends
The biggest laugh has to come at the end.
years people three
Most people, you do a TV series, it ends three, four, five years later; it's a relic,
humorous phones wish
I wish I was a phone machine. I wish if I saw somebody on the street I didn't want to talk to I could just go, "Excuse me, I'm not here right now, If you just leave a message, I can walk away."
funny running news
I have a problem with the strip that runs along the bottom of the news programs. Don't these idiots who run the news programs know we don't want to read? That's why we're watching TV.
morning sleep kids
Sometimes they'll make little Play-Doh animals, and when they go to sleep, I'll break the heads off the animals and put them at the foot of their beds for them to discover in the morning. Nothing wrong with sending your kids a little Sicilian message.
blessing life-is torture
Your blessing in life is when you find the torture you're comfortable with.
want fame possibility
Why would you want to work for a living if you could just joke around? Being a celebrity expands your commercial possibilities.
health want amusing
Of course, everyone wants to be healthy. The amusing thing is no one's really sure how to do it.
funny travel car
Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965.
ice fudge hot
We got the hot fudge on the bottom.... that allows you to control the fudge distribution while you're eating your ice cream.