Joan Rivers
Joan Rivers
Joan Alexandra Molinsky, better known as Joan Rivers, was an American comedian, actress, writer, producer, and television host noted for her often controversial comedic persona—where she was alternately self-deprecating or sharply acerbic, especially toward celebrities and politicians...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth8 June 1933
CountryUnited States of America
temples needs body
My body is a temple, and my temple needs redecorating
funny awards people
The people voting for the Oscars are so old. I haven't seen one Academy Award voter with a tampon in her purse.
sex humorous two
Now, I'm not against sex before marriage, but two minutes before? When the organist played "Here Comes the Bride"...
sex humorous
Better laid than never.
comedy beats should
Comedy is a very rough beat. It's no holds barred, as it should be.
gay cost married
Gay marriage, I am so against it because if all my gay friends get married, it will cost me a fortune in gifts.
simple thinking worry
I like my politicians and my judges and my lawyers to be simple. I think if you worry about where your hemline is you're really not concentrating on the world crisis.
laughing life-is-hard tubes
Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise we're going down the tube.
fashion enjoy
Everyone takes fashion so seriously! It's fashion - enjoy it!
almost attainment barriers determine frequently resolution scales true
Where there is a will there is a way. is an old true saying. He who resolves upon doing a thing, by that very resolution often scales the barriers to it, and secures its achievement. To think we are able, is almost to be so - to determine upon attainment is frequently attainment itself.
enjoy funny gets goes life upset wrong
Life goes by fast. Enjoy it. Calm down. It's all funny. Next. Everyone gets so upset about the wrong things.
american-comedian call gifts today tomorrow yesterday
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call it the present.
angry change dwell months move six somebody waste year
I never dwell on what happened. You can't change it. Move forward. Don't waste your energy on being angry at something that somebody did six months ago or a year ago. It's over. Done. Move forward.
chat dressing jokes knocked room ruined russell
I made so many jokes about poor Russell Crowe, he once knocked on my dressing room door, and told me he wanted to go out on this chat show we were on to laugh with me. Now he's ruined it. I can't make another joke about him.