Steven Wright
Steven Wright
Steven Alexander Wrightis an American comedian, actor, writer, and an Oscar-winning film producer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical, and sometimes nonsensical jokes, paraprosdokians, non sequiturs, anti-humor, and one-liners with contrived situations...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth6 December 1955
CountryUnited States of America
funny dog moving
I got a dog and named him 'Stay'. Now, I go 'Come here, Stay!' After a while, the dog went insane and wouldn't move at all.
dog my-dog walks
I don’t have to walk my dog anymore. I walked him all at once.
dog people ledges
The other day, I was walking my dog around my building . . . on the ledge. Some people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.
dog new-york florida
I took my dog for a walk... all the way from New York to Florida... I said to him "There now you're done."
dog pet gone
I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
dog fun insane
I bought a dog the other day. . . . I named him Stay. It's fun to call him. . . . "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing.
funny dog silly
I named my dog Stay, so I can say, 'Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!
dog cat eye
I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles.
dog paranoid not-sure
I got a new dog. He's a paranoid retriever. He brings back everything because he's not sure what I threw him.
although leave whenever
I was cesarean born. You can't really tell, although whenever I leave a house, I go out through a window.
happens
It happens so fast, and I've been doing it so long that it's unconscious,
bond effect factor line modelling per petrol remains rise suggest yields
Our modelling suggest bond yields should rise in line with the US by at least 1 per cent. The X factor remains any flow-on effect from petrol prices.
american-comedian bothers deep grow
Sponges grow in the ocean. This bothers me. How deep would it be if they didn't?
american-comedian
It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.