W. C. Fields
W. C. Fields
William Claude Dukenfield, better known as W. C. Fields, was an American comedian, actor, juggler and writer. Fields' comic persona was a misanthropic and hard-drinking egotist, who remained a sympathetic character despite his snarling contempt for dogs and children...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionMovie Actor
Date of Birth29 January 1880
CityDarby, PA
CountryUnited States of America
wedding believe long
I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck
thinking long church
I think of the church often. Not because religion was closing in on me, but because for a long time my ass was sore from that hard, unupholstered pew.
simple long swallowing
So long as the presence of death lurks with anyone who goes through the simple act of swallowing, I will make mine whiskey.
heart worry long
Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
everyday simple smile smiles start
Start off everyday with a simple smile and get it over with.
politics
Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.
american-comedian prejudice
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
drove thank
It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.
american-comedian lies
Here lies W. C. Fields. I would rather be living in Philadelphia.
reform
Go back to reform school, you little nose-picker!
equality free hate
I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
bad face gold head looked miles seven sleep teeth wrinkled
Well, her face was so wrinkled it looked like seven miles of bad road. She had so many gold teeth . . . she used to have to sleep with her head in a safe.
rather
On the whole I would rather be in Philadelphia.
cross eat heart hope weight
Cross my heart and hope to eat my weight in goslings.