Chris Rock
Chris Rock
Christopher Julius "Chris" Rock III is an American comedian, actor, and producer...
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth7 February 1965
CityAndrews, SC
faces want bigs
No, I want big ol' titties in my face!
planes gas i-can
I can't even put gas in my plane!
couple spices married
Whenever I go out with other married couples, I like to bring along a single crackhead. Just to spice things up.
daughter daddy doe
One of my daughters told me the other day, "Kevin Hart is funnier than you, Daddy." I told her, "Does Kevin Hart make you pancakes?"
zebras men white-man
Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof!
carols
Carol Leifer is funny, really funny.
overrated hacks
I'm severely overrated. I'm just above a hack.
companion knows
I love having somebody there - that companion thing. You know who you're going to eat with, who you're going to see a movie with.
dream morning garden
My goals were small. My goal was to become a big enough stand-up that I wouldn't have to do radio. I could sell out a club, which is like 300 seats. If I got big enough, I could sell before I got there, and I wouldn't have to get up at 6 in the morning to do radio. That was pretty much the dream. I had no idea I'd be playing Madison Square Garden or anything.
always-complaining impossible mets
You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.
depressing talking firsts
I like talking about subjects that aren't funny in the first place and making them funny. So anything down and depressing is something I'll talk about.
daughter jobs men
My relationship with my daughter is gonna affect her relationship with men for the rest of her life... Sometimes I'm walking with my daughter. I'm pushing her in the stroller, and sometimes I just pick her up and stare at her, and I realize, my only job in life is to keep her off the pole.
daughter growing-up son
I'm old enough to remember when there were no black quarterbacks - there were no blacks on TV. I hope my son or daughter doesn't have to be as fixated on race as I am, because he or she will grow up in freer times.
work-out trying clubs
A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material.