Dave Attell
Dave Attell
Dave Attellis an American stand-up comedian, writer and actor, best known as the host of Comedy Central's Insomniac with Dave Attell and The Gong Show with Dave Attell. Born in Queens, New York, he grew up in Rockville Centre, New York with his cousins the Small family and now lives in New York City...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth18 January 1965
CityQueens, NY
CountryUnited States of America
sex funny-relationship thinking
Sex and murder are the same. Well, you say the same after both don't you? 'Damn I got to get the hell out of here! What was I thinking!'
laughing sound watches
I have a lot of pot tendencies. I'm always late, I laugh for no reason, I watch Jeopardy! with the sound off and make up my own questions.
comic jokes
I'm a joke comic. I tell jokes.
girlfriend sometimes said
I don't have a girlfriend but sometimes I like to pretend I do. I just stand in my apartment screaming No, that's not what I said!
drunk littles pancakes
I wanna get a little drunk, but I also want some pancakes.
water trying president
It's a horrible economy but I'm trying to do my part. I just bought a new shower curtain it has all the presidents on it. Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with all the presidents staring at you? And when the water hits them it looks like they're crying.
type performers
I'm not like a performer type.
tvs
I like doing stand-up and I love putting out TV specials.
ejaculation fancy mature
Pre-mature ejaculation. Let's talk about it. Pre-mature ejaculation. That's a pretty fancy term for, Ooooooh Oh no. This has never happened before.
laughter boys breathing
Everyone was laughin'. Even that deaf mute boy was breathing heavy and pointing at me. Which is laughter to their kind.
schemes
I have no grand scheme.
wanted
I never wanted to be famous.
sex animal men
Men are having sex with animals and we wonder why the animals attack us. And I'll tell you why: it's cuz of that one sick man, and it's up to me and a half-mexican to stop him.
lonely kind
Being on the road is kind of lonely.