Related Quotes
funny wall cancer
Donald, I'm not sure if you're even aware of this, but the only difference between you and Michael Douglas from the movie, Wall Street, is that no one's going to be sad when you get cancer. Anthony Jeselnik
funny girlfriend couple
A couple of months ago, I gave my girlfriend some fancy lingerie, and she actually got mad at me. She said, 'Anthony, I think this is more of a gift for you than it is for me.' And I said, 'If you want to get technical, it was originally a gift for my last girlfriend.'
funny dad father
My dad was a complicated man. He was a huge racist, my dad, but he still tried to be a good father, you know? Like, he would tell me that Santa Claus was black - that way, when I found out he didn't exist, it wouldn't be that big a let down.
funny mom brother
When I finished high school, I wanted to take all my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle. But my mom said no. See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was 18. And I could just have his motorcycle.
funny blessed dental
Blessed are they who hold lively conversations with the helplessly mute, for they shall be called dentists. Ann Landers
funny motivational hilarious
Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other.
funny children talking
If you want your children to listen, try talking softly - to someone else.
funny hilarious party
At every party there are two kinds of people - those who want to go home and those who don't. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other.
funny friends country
One out of four people in this country is mentally unbalanced. Think of your three closes friends; if they seem OK, then you're the one.
humorists
Great humorists are great insulters. Dick Cavett
animal soul special
The virtue of a faculty is related to the special function which that faculty performs. Now there are three elements in the soul which control action and the attainment of truth: namely, Sensation, Intellect, and Desire. Of these, Sensation never originates action, as is shown by the fact that animals have sensation but are not capable of action. Aristotle
animal contrary dangerous eating lion people riding shark tiger
Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It's a shark riding on an elephant's back, just trampling and eating everything they see. 
animals care days friday monday type
You have to take care of these animals 365 days of the year. It's not just a Monday through Friday type of job.
animal rights avid
I am an avid supporter of PETA and all animals as well as animal rights programs. Corey Feldman
animal attention chamber devote feeding park
We are disappointed that the chamber did not devote any attention to CAFOs (concentrated animal feeding operations), which an ag park could invite,
animal missing doubt
To describe an animal as a physico-chemical system of extreme complexityis no doubt perfectly correct, except that it misses out on the animalness of the animal. E. F. Schumacher
animal light talking
In the highest sense, we are all creatures of light. And I have a very difficult time talking with people who are cynical about the world. "The world is no damn good, and we're all animals," and that kind of thing. Well, I'm an animal. Richard Bach
animal turtles spirit
My spirit animal... probably like a turtle, because I have no concept of time. Rita Ora
animal years people
No animal on the face of the earth could conceive of taxation. You and I work roughly six months a year to pay our local, state and federal taxes. If nothing else, this should convince you that animals are smarter than people. Rita Mae Brown