Frank Carson
Frank Carson
Hugh Francis "Frank" Carson KSGwas an Irish comedian and actor, best known on television in series such as The Comedians and Tiswas. He was a member of the entertainment charity the Grand Order of Water Rats...
NationalityIrish
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth6 November 1926
CountryIreland
funny humor men
Men only go for skinny women because they're too weak to argue - and salads are cheap.
funny humor swimming
I said to the waitress, "There's a fly swimming in my soup." She said: "You've got too much soup - he should only be able to paddle."
funny memories humor
I was going up to the bathroom and a woman asked me: "Have you a good memory for faces?" I asked why and she said: "Because there isn't a mirror up there."
funny humor men
A man walked into a shop and asked, "How much are your eggs?" He said "£1.40 a dozen". He then asked: "How much are your cracked ones?" He said: "35p". He said: "Crack us four dozen."
funny humor doors
I have a pacemaker in, but it doesn't work very well, because every time I fart the garage door opens.
funny humor men
The Irish Six Million Dollar man only cost three quid.
funny humor want
So I rang up British Telecom, I said 'I want to report a nuisance caller', he said 'Not you again'.
funny humor homeless
The council in Blackpool have given the homeless bus passes, but how would they know where to get off?
funny war father
My father fought in World War I and single-handedly destroyed the Germans' line of communication. He ate their pigeon.
funny humor mirrors
My wife went into the butchers and said: "You've a sheep's head in your window." The butcher said: "That's a mirror."
funny humor night
There was an Irish space program to go to the sun. They went at night so they didn't get burnt.
funny girlfriend humor
I'm really worried about my girlfriend's morals ... she has NEXT written on her knickers.
funny party humor
An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman were invited to a Christmas party. The Englishman brought a bag of tinsel, the Scotsman brought a bag of holly and they asked the Irishman: "What have you brought?" He said: "I brought a pair of knickers." They asked: "What has that got to do with Christmas?" He said "They're Carol's."
funny humor night
I was in a panto last year, Aladdin and The Wonderful Lamp. I played the wick. I got the sack because I was too well-oiled every night.