Henny Youngman
Henny Youngman
Henry "Henny" Youngmanwas an American comedian and violinist famous for his mastery of the "one-liner". His best known one-liner was "Take my wife ... please"...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth16 March 1906
CountryUnited States of America
funny humor men
A woman says to a man, "I haven't seen you around here." "Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife." "So you're single!"
funny humor men
A Polish man had his vasectomy done at Sears. Now when he makes love, the garage door goes up.
funny humor men
A Polish man in a helicopter. Goes up to 800 feet. Down it comes! What happened? "It got chilly up there, so I turned off the fan!"
funny humor okay
Are you Polish? Okay, I'll talk slower.
funny humor men
He is the only man I ever met with a seersucker face.
being-happy money use
What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.
funny-inspirational winning battle
When you battle with your conscience and lose, you win.
husband fall home
A man is at the bar, drunk. I pick him up off the floor, and offer to take him home. On the way to my car, he falls down three times. When I get to his house, I help him out of the car, and on the way to the front door, he falls down four more times. I ring the bell and say, Here's your husband! The man's wife says, Where's his wheelchair?
drinking beer drunk
A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says "Okay, let's get started.
anniversary husband inspiration
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
wife cards saving
Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won't be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did
years doing-nothing impossible
Who says nothing is impossible? I've been doing nothing for years.
atheist holiday christmas-wishes
I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
marriage letting-go hands
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.