Steven Wright
Steven Wright
Steven Alexander Wrightis an American comedian, actor, writer, and an Oscar-winning film producer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical, and sometimes nonsensical jokes, paraprosdokians, non sequiturs, anti-humor, and one-liners with contrived situations...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth6 December 1955
CountryUnited States of America
funny real humor
When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask if I'm leaving.
funny humor together
Why are they called a-part-ments, when they're all stuck together?
food humor cooking
I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it.
doors justice garage
I got a garage door opener. It can't close. Just open.
funny humor hands
My grandfather gave me a watch. It doesn't have any hands or numbers. He says it's very accurate. I asked him what time it was. You can guess what he told me.
zebras reading turns
I finally got around to reading the dictionary. Turns out the Zebra did it.
funny humor suitcases
Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?
funny humor invisible-ink
How do you tell when you’re out of invisible ink?
funny humor men
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
funny humor heart
I went to San Francisco. I found someone’s heart.
funny song humor
Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
funny humor doe
When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?
funny real humor
Why is it lemon juice contains mostly artificial ingredients but dishwashing liquid contains real lemons?
funny humor doors
Why is it, when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open, it's not a door?