Famous Quotes & Sayings

Dave Barry

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.

Dave Barry

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

Carl Sagan

But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright Brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.

Buddy Hackett

As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

Friends are what God gives you to make up for your family.

Bryan White

Christmas makes me happy no matter what time of year it comes around.

Catherine Deneuve

A woman has to be intelligent, have charm, a sense of humor, and be kind. It's the same qualities I require from a man.

Cary Grant

I think that making love is the best form of exercise.

Caroline Kennedy

In a funny way, poems are suited to modern life. They're short, they're intense. Nobody has time to read a 700-page book. People read magazines, and a poem takes less time than an article.

Carolina Herrera

I can get ready in 10 minutes.

Carlos Santana

Your wrinkles either show that you're nasty, cranky, and senile, or that you're always smiling.

Agnes Repplier

Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding.

Agnes Repplier

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.

Abba Eban

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.

Alan King

Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?

Alan Kay

Most software today is very much like an Egyptian pyramid with millions of bricks piled on top of each other, with no structural integrity, but just done by brute force and thousands of slaves.

Charlie Chaplin

All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.

Charlie Chaplin

I have no further use for America. I wouldn't go back there if Jesus Christ was President.

Charlie Chaplin

To help a friend in need is easy, but to give him your time is not always opportune.

Charlie Chaplin

A day without laughter is a day wasted.

Charlie Chaplin

Life can be wonderful if you're not afraid of it. All it takes is courage, imagination ... and a little dough

Charles Dudley Warner

Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it.

Charles Dudley Warner

A great artist can paint a great picture on a small canvas.

Charles de Gaulle

I wouldn't mind dying for France, but not for Air France.

Charles de Gaulle

Hearing Mass is the ceremony I most favor during my travels. Church is the only place where someone speaks to me and I do not have to answer back.

Charles de Gaulle

You may be sure that the Americans will commit all the stupidities they can think of, plus some that are beyond imagination.

Charles de Gaulle

He who laughs last didn't get the joke.

Charles de Gaulle

The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.

Charles Dickens

We spent as much money as we could and got as little for it as people could make up their minds to give us. We were always more or less miserable, and most of our acquaintance were in the same condition. There was a gay fiction among us that we were constantly enjoying ourselves, and a skeleton truth that we never did. To the best of my belief, our case was in the last aspect a rather common one.

Charles Dickens

Any man may be in good spirits and good temper when he's well dressed. There ain't much credit in that.

Charles Dickens

It being a part of Mrs. Pipchin's system not to encourage a child's mind to develop and expand itself like a young flower, but to open it by force like an oyster.

Charles Dickens

I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it.

Charles Dickens

All knives and forks were working away at a rate that was quite alarming; very few words were spoken; and everybody seemed to eat his utmost, in self defence, as if a famine were expected to set in before breakfast-time to-morrow morning, and it had become high time to assert the first law of nature.