Author unknown
Author unknown
hit women
Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower.
bald beer equal head street until walk women
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
gift history present today tomorrow yesterday
Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery, but today is a gift that is why it is called the present
gets house pizza society
We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
wake
Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep.
copyright effective known man protection scratched
The most effective copyright protection known to man : a scratched CD.
planet save
Save the Earth... it's the only planet with chocolate.
insult rubs tv
A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
artificial intelligence match natural
Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
fruit knowing knowledge putting tomato wisdom
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
christian church garage standing
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
rag smell
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
learn people supposed
If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child.
fascinates sit
I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.