Bill Bailey
Bill Bailey
Mark Robert "Bill" Baileyis an English comedian, musician, actor, TV and radio presenter and author. Bailey is well known for his role in Black Books and for his appearances on Never Mind the Buzzcocks, Have I Got News for You, and QI as well as his extensive stand-up work...
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth13 January 1965
CityBath, England
running kings law
The way we live in the West we live like kings. People moan about this and that in Britain but we have running water, electricity, security and a rule of law and so many people in the world don't have these.
funny humor people
People say 'Bill, are you an optimist?' And I say, 'I hope so.'
funny humor existentialist
I am a confectionery-based existentialist.
disappointment chocolate despair
I'm English, and as such I crave disappointment. That's why I buy Kinder Surprise. Horrible chocolate; nasty little toy: a double-whammy of disillusionment ! Sometimes I eat the toy out of sheer despair.
funny humor thank-god
Thank God for Darwin, eh?
funny horse humor
A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "Why the long face?". The horse replies: "I'm deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."
kids program surrounded swimming water
A swimming program for kids in a place surrounded by water is essential.
contact insurance kindly realized start wise
He very kindly let me set up so I could start communicating back to the insurance companies. The more I had contact with George, got to know him better, the more I realized this is a very wise man. He's been around a long time.
adrift fate mercy people poignancy sadness suppose wonderful
There's a wonderful sadness and poignancy about those Finnish films. They have people adrift at the mercy of fate. They're heartwarming. I also find them funny. I suppose that makes me an optimist.
damages insurance looking numbers sustain wondering
We've been looking at the numbers and wondering just how long we can sustain the kind of insured damages we've been getting. If insurance is not affordable, it's really not available.
building codes enforce stronger
We need to have stronger zoning codes and building codes, and we need to enforce them.
funny vegetarianism comedy
It's true. Hitler was a vegetarian. Just goes to show, vegetarianism, not always a good thing. Can in some extreme cases lead to genocide.
knowing contentment knowing-someone
Contentment is knowing you're right. Happiness is knowing someone else is wrong.
funny crush flower
Do not crush the flowers of wisdom with the hobnail boots of cynicism.