Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin
Demetri Evan Martinis an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer, and humorist. He is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, being a contributor on The Daily Show, and his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 May 1973
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
funny humor opposites
One of my favorite clothing patterns is camouflage. Because when you're in the woods it makes you blend in. But when you're not it does just the opposite. It's like "hey, there's an asshole."
funny humor listening
I have an erratic drummer for anybody who's just listening to this, he can keep time, but just in spurts.
funny kids your-side
Sometimes I feel like I'm making a connection with a stranger, but then it turns out I'm not. Like, I was in a mall, and I saw this lady hitting her kid. So I went up to her, and I was like, "Yeah, get him!" She got all mad at me. I was like, "I'm on your side here."
want stranger
Don't talk to strangers. Sure, unless you want to meet anyone ever.
battle band loser
At the battle of the bands the loser's always the audience.
names guy would-be
A good name for a gang would be The Uneducated Idiot Tough Guys.
blood trying frozen
To remove blood stains from your conscience try frozen margaritas.
thinking ties language
I think the most annoying language is a tie between all the ones I don't know how to speak.
men guy badminton
One thing you never hear is Man that guy is good at badminton.
sports real games
To look like you are a real sports fan, when there is a game on TV just yell, Oh, come on! every now and then at the TV.
taken land earth
A large portion of the Earth's land area is taken up by old varsity jackets.
beer mind body
My mind says one thing, but my body says another. Thanks a lot, Indian food and beer.
rooms planning globes
Planning trip around the globe, that is in my room.
impossible cyclops
It is impossible for a cyclops to wink.