Milton Berle
Milton Berle
Milton Berlewas an American comedian and actor. As the host of NBC's Texaco Star Theater, he was the first major American television star and was known to millions of viewers as "Uncle Miltie" and "Mr. Television" during TV's golden age...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Actor
Date of Birth12 July 1908
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
valentine doors wife
I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine.
normal looks want
You look like a normal person, if you can find a normal person who wants to look like that.
nice men car
A man is hit by a car while crossing a Beverly Hills street. A woman rushes to him and cradles his head in her lap, asking, Are you comfortable? The man answers, I make a nice living.
high-heels guy together
Who says we didn't have controversial subjects on TV back in my time? Remember Bonanza? It was about three guys in high heels living together
golf remember backwards
Just remember, golf is flog spelled backwards.
looks helping prosperity
Money can't buy you happiness. It just helps you look for it in more places.
christmas wife size
I gave my wife a gift certificate for Christmas. She ran out to exchange it for a bigger size.
christmas son yesterday
I bought my son an indestructible toy. Yesterday he left it in the driveway. It broke my car.
christmas new-year son
I bought my son a bat for Christmas. On New Year's it flew away.
christmas batteries
For Christmas the just came out with a battery-operated battery. But the batteries aren't included.
christmas doctors years
Every year my boss used to give me a bottle of expensive brandy because I'd told him that my doctor suggested a drink once in a while. This year my boss gave me the name of a new doctor.
christmas office guy
I wanted to get the guy who works next to me in the office something he really wants, but how do you wrap up a saloon?
christmas son lists
There are a lot of things money can't buy. Not one of them is on my son's list.
christmas gadgets saws
I was in a department store and I saw a weird-looking gadget. I asked the young saleslady what it was. She answered, "It doesn't do anything. It's just a Christmas gift."