Milton Berle
Milton Berle
Milton Berlewas an American comedian and actor. As the host of NBC's Texaco Star Theater, he was the first major American television star and was known to millions of viewers as "Uncle Miltie" and "Mr. Television" during TV's golden age...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Actor
Date of Birth12 July 1908
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
quitting payroll ifs
If you hire relatives, you'll have a payroll that won't quit.
valentine wife cards
All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express.
brother worry littles
My brother applied for work, but was told by the company that it had more employees than it needed. My brother said, "Don't worry. The little bit of work I do won't be noticed !!!"
golf remember backwards
Just remember, golf is flog spelled backwards.
dream brother sleep
I have a brother who is afraid to go to sleep, he dreams he's working.
suffering drink jew
Jews don't drink much because it interferes with their suffering.
normal looks want
You look like a normal person, if you can find a normal person who wants to look like that.
people radio wonderful
Radio... that wonderful invention by which I can reach millions of people... who fortunately can't reach me.
lost jokes
I never stole a joke in my life. I just find them before they're lost.
fall men missing
A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, Did you miss a step? No, he answers, I hit every one of them!
guy faces remember
Remember when you had your face lifted... and the guy brought it back.
real valentine thinking
My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay.
high-heels guy together
Who says we didn't have controversial subjects on TV back in my time? Remember Bonanza? It was about three guys in high heels living together
mother flower valentine
On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse.