Steven Wright
Steven Wright
Steven Alexander Wrightis an American comedian, actor, writer, and an Oscar-winning film producer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical, and sometimes nonsensical jokes, paraprosdokians, non sequiturs, anti-humor, and one-liners with contrived situations...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth6 December 1955
CountryUnited States of America
funny humor coats
I had my coat hangers spayed.
funny fall humor
The sky is falling. No, I'm tipping over backwards.
funny humor batteries
I went to the hardware store to buy some batteries, but they weren't included, so I had to buy them again.
funny humor home
The other night I came home late, and tried to unlock my house with my car keys. I started the house up. So, I drove it around for a while. I was speeding, and a cop pulled me over. He asked where I lived. I said, "Right here, officer."
funny humor skydiving
I was skydiving horizontally.
funny humor fax-machines
I have a fax machine with "fax waiting".
funny father humor
My father was a small claims court jester.
funny humor resisting
I was once arrested for resisting arrest.
funny humor speed
The speed of time is one second per second.
funny humor cowboy
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
funny humor numbers
Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
funny humor doe
If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
funny sex humor
Having sex with her is incredible. It's just like a concert. We throw Frisbees around the room. And when she wants more she lights a match.
funny humor thickness
My socks DO match. They're the same thickness.