Famous Quotes & Sayings

Malcolm Bradbury

I like the English. They have the most rigid code if immorality in the world.

Magic Johnson

On his telepathic understanding with James Worthy- It's almost like we have ESPN.

Magic Johnson

On the best tactic when playing alongside Kareem Abdul-Jabbar- Just give him the ball.

Magic Johnson

I only know how to play two ways: reckless and abandon.

Maimonides

Astrology is not an art, it is a disease.

Mahatma Gandhi

What do I think of Western civilization? I think it would be a very good idea.

Gene Wilder

The suspense is terrible. I hope it'll last.

Gail Collins

Unfortunately, he was about as deep as a melted ice cube.

Madame de Stael

The more I see of man, the more I like dogs.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

To live as one likes is plebian the noble man aspires to order and law.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

If a man writes a book, let him set down only what he knows. I have guesses enough of my own.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

We are never deceived; we deceive ourselves.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different.

Joe Walsh

The song tells me what to play.

Joe Louis

Yeah, I'm scared. I'm scared I might kill Schmeling.

Joaquin Phoenix

I have this horrible sense of humor where I think discomfort is funny - partly because I experience discomfort a lot, and it's a way of laughing at it and getting a release.

Jo Brand

The thing I thought about doing it was it's Comic Relief and you've got to be funny. So although I did try to sing properly it obviously has hilarious results when you can't sing.

Jo Brand

Who do I like? I am a big fan of French and Saunders - not that that they are particularly stand-up I have to say, but I think they have been great for women and they are of themselves just incredibly funny whether they are male or female.

George Eliot

He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow.

James Thurber

Progress was all right. Only it went on too long.

James Thurber

Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?

James Thurber

There is no safety in numbers, or in anything else.

James Thurber

Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.

James Stewart

Learn from the masters, learn from your contemporaries. Always try to update yourself.

James Patterson

Can I come in? No! I'm in a towel! I'm blind!

Ellsworth Huntington

The buffalo is a surprisingly stupid animal.

Elayne Boosler

Ever notice that Soup for One is eight aisles away from Party Mix?

Elayne Boosler

When the sun comes up, I have morals again.

Elayne Boosler

You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little potbelly and a bald spot.

Elayne Boosler

I'm just a person trapped inside a woman's body.

Elayne Boosler

I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.

Elayne Boosler

We have women in the military, but they don't put us in the front lines. They don't know if we can fight, if we can kill. I think we can. All the general has to do is walk over to the women and say, 'You see the enemy over there? They say you look fat in those uniforms.'

Edward Teller

When you're certain you cannot be fooled, you become easy to fool.