Famous Quotes & Sayings

Aziz Ansari

I'm in a situation with this girl that's as hopeless as overthrowing the Bush administration.

Aziz Ansari

Do It Under the Influence Yourself! That's what we're shooting for! Get drunk and make your dreams come true.

Ayn Rand

There is a level of cowardice lower than that of the conformist: the fashionable non-conformist.

Ayn Rand

I think it's funny. There was a time when men were afraid that somebody would reveal some secret of theirs that was unknown to their fellows. Nowadays, they're afraid that somebody will name what everybody knows. Have you practical people ever thought that that's all it would take to blast your whole, big, complex structure, with all your laws and guns - just somebody naming the exact nature of what you're doing?

Ayn Rand

Money is the barometer of a society's virtue.

Ayn Rand

So you think that money is the root of all evil. Have you ever asked what is the root of all money?

Bertrand Russell

There is no need to worry about mere size. We do not necessarily respect a fat man more than a thin man. Sir Isaac Newton was very much smaller than a hippopotamus, but we do not on that account value him less.

Bertrand Russell

Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim.

Bertrand Russell

I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong.

Benjamin Disraeli

It destroys one's nerves to be amiable every day to the same human being.

Benjamin Disraeli

No man is regular in his attendance at the House of Commons until he is married.

Benjamin Disraeli

Talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours.

Benjamin Disraeli

Everyone likes flattery; and when you come to Royalty you should lay it on with a trowel.

Benjamin Disraeli

Her Majesty is not a subject.

Benjamin Disraeli

Every man has a right to be conceited until he is successful.

Benjamin Disraeli

My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me.

Benjamin Disraeli

When men are pure, laws are useless; when men are corrupt, laws are broken.

Benjamin Disraeli

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.

Ben E. King

Yeah. I've been pretty fortunate to travel I guess, all around the place.

Carl Sandburg

In democracy both a deep reverence and a sense of the comic are requisite.

Carl Sandburg

I'm an idealist. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way.

Cameron Diaz

I've been noticing gravity since I was very young.

C. S. Lewis

It is a very funny thing that the sleepier you are, the longer you take about getting to bed.

Damon Runyon

The race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, but that's the way to bet.

Craig Kilborn

Strange medical news from Pakistan: A man had a successful organ transplant with a dog. They gave the man a dog's organ. In a related story today, Keith Richards was seen chasing a mailman.

Craig Ferguson

People sometimes say to me: "Craig, get out of my garden."

Craig Ferguson

A casino in South Dakota was robbed by a man dressed as a mummy. The police described the suspect as anywhere between 25 and 8,000 years old.

Craig Ferguson

If you're frightened of leprechauns, the best thing to do is to get yourself a little leprechaun outfit and see how big they are. And then you'll go, 'Well I see. That's like bein' frightened of a hampster.'

Craig Ferguson

Wait! Don't applaud my cheapness! I've got other crap I need help with!

Craig Ferguson

I enjoy bathing, as many Europeans don't.

Craig Ferguson

Welcome back, my cheeky wee monkeys.

Craig Ferguson

I only like sports that Bond villains played.

Craig Ferguson

I have a beard. Just not on my face...